Im Not Leaving Until You Say Yehweh Is My Master Funny Video

I'm Not Leaving Until You Think I'm Cool

Have you ever felt like you were being held hostage by someone's Ego?

Illustration by Z Neutral

Have you ever felt like you were being held hostage by someone's Ego?

You could be talking about one thing, such as a current event, and they make it completely personal? Everything you say, they turn it around and make it about them? They'll even linger in your space, taking up your time, trying to come up with ways for you to validate their coolness.

You're trying to talk about one thing, and they're trying to talk about themselves. They're not even really paying attention to the conversation as it is, but rather looking for trigger words that will justify their launch into an unrelated monologue about themselves. You are not on two sides of the same conversation — you are having two different conversations.

These people are likely to strike at your service industry job — when part of your role is to appear pleasant, interested, and likable, there is usually no escape. It might come off as annoying and inconsiderate at first, but take a step back and look at the big picture. Visualize a shadowy, beast-like figure that haunts them at all times. This beast is named, Ego.

It's almost as though when they want to contribute to the conversation, they have to check with Ego first. Ego then translates what they want to say in a way that satisfies itself.

An ego isn't inherently bad. A poor relationship with your ego is. This ego lies between its owner and whoever is trying to communicate with them. This ego is a monster that doesn't allow for genuine connection; it's greedy and self-serving.

A healthy ego is a self-assured machine. A healthy ego can admire others and appreciate company without drawing comparisons or feeling threatened.

A healthy ego can value silence in and of itself, rather than viewing it as an opportunity to seek external validation.

A healthy ego can listen.

An unhealthy ego is categorized by an inability to interpret situations for what they are and only interpreting them relative to you; it's an assumption that everyone thinks they're better than you, and everything everyone says is an attempt to prove their superiority over you.

So it fights back.

Example:

Chad over here mentions that he wrote a blog post that is relevant to the conversation. This is a threat to Ego: is he saying that he's an Intellectual because he writes and you're not because you don't? Well, how about this, Chad:

"Yeah I write too, check out this piece I wrote. I don't know where to publish it."

That'll show him! Now he knows.

Only, from Chad's perspective, you just disregarded the conversation you were already having and started a new one about yourself.

For the fifth time.

And once again, Chad has nowhere to turn. Nowhere to run. He's being held hostage — he won't be left alone unless he gives your Ego what it wants. He has to at least pretend to read your awkwardly personal (and rather ignorant) piece in front of you, while you stand there and wait for the validation you're owed.

You weren't present in the conversation because your Ego was on a hunt. It was on a hunt for confirmation that you are indeed, the coolest person in the room. Now that you've revealed that you can't carry a conversation, you definitely don't seem like an Intellectual.

By letting your Ego take control, you got the opposite outcome that you were searching for. Your monstrous Ego scared it away.

If this sounds like you, don't worry — there is hope. Rather than seeking explicit, verbal validation of how cool you are, consider this: you're already here. You're in.

If you are invited to a party or a night out, the invitation was your validation. If you're cool enough to be invited, that's it! There is no need to get confirmation that every person present knows how cool you are. It is implied in your presence.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. There is so much to learn by just listening — especially from those who have a lot to learn themselves.

Have a blessed day.

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Source: https://zneutral.medium.com/im-not-leaving-until-you-think-i-m-cool-c8cd5ccd1fb1

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